Far into darkness
it shines both ways
north and south
then out to sea.
Tireless
it sends pulses
of safety and light
Were any saved from
the rocks and rough shore
by its reflecting mirrors
and hand blown glass ~
this bright beacon
always searching
keeping death
in the darkness
away?
I couldn't seem to get any rhythm at all with this. Hope you get the feeling anyways. If any of you poets want to help me out and rework it - I would be so happy! :) SOS means help.....
7 comments:
I'm the last person to ask about poetry (except maybe 446) but I liked it. I like wondering about stories untold.
I've always been fascinated by the people who staff the lighthouses --usually men but sometimes women -- doing lonely, often isolated, and necessary work. Most of the lighthouses now use electronic beacons; a few along our coast (from Maine and well south of Virginia) are still maintained by their caretakers. The ones no longer staffed are even more fascinating to me. Quite a few have been turned in rentals.
Imagination necessarily is the companion of the caretaker, along with a strong constitution and deep knowledge of the landscape.
Did you know there's a U.S. Lighthouse Society that allows private individuals to experience being a "keeper". It's at www.uslhs.org/
re Your poem: I always find it helpful to read a bit about a subject I'm not too familiar with before I try writing a poem. It can help set a frame of mind.
You could try imagining yourself the light keeper (what does she look like, think, feel), and from that come up with images of the landscape, the sea swelled and rough and angry, the people on the boat needing the keeper's beacon to find their way safely, whether you're able to help them in the pitch of night or not. There's a kind of romance in that that cannot be attributed to the electronic beacon--and perhaps you could contrast the two in your poem.
did you take this picture, kathleen?
it is really pretty, and i like the way the lighthouse is framed.
the words and the image... i can smell the sea and hear the gulls. i go back in time. i am on a ship. i feel God with me.
Your suggestion took me deeper Maureen. I'm chewing my cud on that one. :) Thanks girls.....
May I humbly suggest reworking the first stanza in the following manner. It shines both ways / Far into darkness / Then out to sea / North and South. Make each line speak for itself rather than wrapping lines to lot like verse. Consider the same for the remaining stanzas.
Hello lovely Kathleen -- this photo is very compelling.
as are your words
you could also just try shifting the breaks.
Far
into darkness
it shines
both
ways
north
and south
then out
to sea.
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