Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Sucking on Succor

Succor means: to aid, assist, help, offer comfort, encouragement.

This last week, I was in the sludge of discouragement. I took the week off from the world wide web and connected with comfortable behaviors and uncomfortable ones. I didn't have the inclination or energy for too much eyeball to eyeball or skin to skin engagement. For introverts it can be exhausting at such times.

Many hours were spent reading. This activity included a dog curled up on the blanket corner at my feet and a hot mug of tea. It was restorative and inspirational reading. Contemplative. Nourishing. Quiet.

I dug out some dormant art supplies which haven't been used in years. Sitting down facing a blank white page paralyzed me for a while. I finally gave myself permission to be a kid and simply put color on the white paper. It didn't turn out very good. The next one not much better. The third? Pretty much the same. Each was whimsical and colorful, though. They will stay private or be gracefully laid in the garbage. The thing was - I needed to be creative in new ways. Make myself uncomfortable. The finished products weren't good, but they bushwhacked the brush, clearing some plugged trails. The exercise wasn't wasted or futile. Some times creative juices need some sort of laxative to start the flow again........creative constipation happens. Taking action is imperative for me to get unplugged. The momentum carries over into other areas.

Because I was so discouraged, I thought - maybe I'm not the only one. I determined to send personal, hand written encouragement to everyone on my address list who loves words and writes. To give what I needed most. Writers need to know that words do matter in our world. It is a lonely, solitary call. Most the time, the lack of feedback is crushing. We don't know if the void has ears, or if there is a soulish connection being made. As I put that batch of envelopes in the mail, I felt presumptuous and foolish. I have people on my mailing list who surely don't want or need my simple offering? They are VIP's! I heard a mocking cackle of derision gurgling up through the slimy pit below me.

One of the most profound books I've read is The Gift by Lewis Hyde. A gift has to move. In a circle. It has to be passed on. Today I was at the end of the receiving line and got all the abundant excess somehow. Could it be because I offered the little I had to another?  I don't know. Truly I don't.

This day has been so full of gifts being rained down on me. A blizzard of emotional goodness swirling me in loving eddies of affection and encouragement. I feel like I'm sucking on a succor cube of sweetness.

It came on a day that I thought I was going down gasping one last time - like Stevie Smith said, "Not waving but drowning."

Be strong and of good courage my friend. You are beloved. You are not alone.


Monica Sharman said...

No, I am not alone. Because you made me feel like a VIP. Thank you so very much. You, too, pour out and fulfill.

"who surely don't want or need..." Oh, no. People do want and need. *I* want and need, and I thank you for the giving.

I love how you put that: "sucking on..." Yup, I take it whenever it comes! I am an encouragement sponge!

Susan said...

'I am called, no matter what I do.' Nothing is insignificant.

Maureen said...

Your friendship is one of the best gifts I've ever received. Your notes sent out throughreal-life mail delight. You show, always, that you are never too busy to care. You are not alone.

"Love is the only emotion that expands intelligence." (Humberto Maturana, scientist) You have it and give it in abundance.

M.L. Gallagher said...

Some times creative juices need some sort of laxative to start the flow again........creative constipation happens. -- the gift I see in you Kathleen is your ability to touch hearts and minds and lift spirits with your quiet and constant reminder -- I am not alone. You are not alone. We are not alone.

You are, my friend, always there and I am grateful for your presence here and in real life when you arrive in my mailbox with your beautiful reminders -- we are connected.

Love and hugs


Joules Evans said...

I have a principle of fill and spill that I think you demonstrate like a beautiful work of art. You spill yourself out loving, you go to God, He fills you. Then repeat. To infinity.

I heart you, Kathleen Overby. Your words are always a T-KO. Get, it... KO, as in the initials on my envelops!

katdish said...

Your friendship and encouragement is a precious gift to me. So many times I've attacked a white canvas with such great hope only to be disappointed with the results. But you're right, the effort is never wasted. It pushes us towards the creation we're striving towards.

Laura said...

Always your kindnesses lift me. I'm glad you had some time to be kind to yourself too. you are a precious gift to this community--to the world, Kathleen. And, yes! Send me that link on the briquette! sounds familiar :).

S. Etole said...

Your words are gift ... you matter.

Joyceann Wycoff said...

Kathleen ... many posts ago Louise at Recover Your Joy told us about an African tribe that has no word for love but rather says, "I am beautiful in my heart for you." That's what you do ... with your posts and your beautiful real-live notes, you make each of us beautiful in our hearts for you.

You are a treasure!

Laura said...

Hi, beautiful friend. I'm back to say that I received my note yesterday. Oh, you. How you do bless. Thank you.

David Rupert said...

I got my note. Thank you for the encouragement.

Kathleen Overby said...

I love you all. :)